Should
Misted Path: Leica Q2
“We see things not as they are, but as we are.”
When the path ahead is misted, ‘should’ is a compelling invitation.
The ‘shoulds’ gleefully arrive whenever we look into the unknown.
I know that I should be strong, smart, reliable. I should be decisive, lead from the front, push forwards, be determined, play the game and win.
I should be able to find my way.
Our consideration of leadership and strategic vision is full of how we should be and what we should strive towards. And in our organisations, these ambitions become political; everybody knows that we should chase growth, margin and market. Oh, and I should be busy…
I’m disconnecting myself from ‘should’ but it’s taking a while.
A lifetime of taking on other people’s rules for living, leadership and business, all of which are hopelessly dated and inadequate for the problems we face now, has left me hearing echoes and the siren calls of false safety and security.
The subtle obedience of ‘should’ is no foundation for the vision we need as we build a future that will sustain us. When we confine ourselves to what is ‘acceptable’ behaviour and constantly try to correct our way towards the perfect model of achievement , we cut ourselves off from the possibility of finding out who we really are and the awareness that might connect us into the reality of the world around us.
The voices of ‘should’ lift us off our feet; we become ungrounded, adrift, and lose contact with our lived experience of what is going on right here, right now. Without a clear sense of self, we lose the capacity for generative, creative, spontaneous leadership.
As we search for our way through the mist, we will need straight talk and clear vision, unobscured by the introjections of our past.
Whose voice will you listen to? And what will you see?
Notes:
Stanley Herman and Michael Korenich seemed to coin the phrase ‘authentic management’ before it became a consultancy and leadership development fad. Their book, “Authentic Management": a gestalt guide to organisations and their development” is rarely left on the office bookshelf for long. Published in 1977, it is full of timeless wisdom and secondhand copies are well worth snapping up.
Our ‘micro-shoulds’ can quickly amplify into the full-blown shouting of a noisy inner critic. Steve Chapman’s ‘not very good’ Ted Talk where he explores the whisper in his ear that constantly tells him he isn’t good enough and that he should never try anything new.
In the world of Action Research, this kind of ‘First-Person’ inquiry into who and how we are provides the foundation for other kinds of more outward facing action. You might enjoy Judi Marshall’s excellent ‘First Person Action Research: Living Life as Inquiry’ which is a key text on our Executive Doctorate in Organisational Change at Ashridge.
